I grew up mostly with my mother. My dad didn’t live with us and really never made an effort to see my sister and I too frequently. As we got older it started becoming a problem that we didn’t call or visit. We would get countless talks about him providing for us financially and that we should be appreciative and show it in some way. There have been multiple threats of disownment and getting cut off because we don’t seem to make the effort.
If you are reading this and you are a dad just like this ,I want to let you know something . Children don’t love you for your money or the things you can provide for them . Children cling to those that show love, that pay genuine attention and that make an effort to know them as they grow up. Children do not cling to the disciplinary figure who is only present when you are in deep shit. Children don’t see you as a constant if you show up once a year to give them a hundred dollars. Children will not put in the effort to call you or visit you if you never did it for them. As a father you have the responsibility to love your children and to ensure that they feel that love, anything short of that is meaningless.
I spent the day with my dad today ,father’s day ,but I didn’t feel I was celebrating anything because to be honest i have never felt like I have had any real male role models. I want to let you know that what your children will feel towards you if you are this kind of parent is obligation ..not love and I’m sure you all want a bit more than that.